Once upon a time, a first-born girl was born in the hills of an ancient city to a family of artists, healers, and scholars of the sacred text. Her whole village was founded by a joyful people who carried a deep love of the Divine queen who, they believed, gave birth to everything that is alive.
When the girl was few months old, she saw the loving goddess coming to give her a kiss during the night and she sang one line of an old tribe song.

The birth of creativity

Her fate was sealed, as she sang before she could even speak, the goddess took her under her wings and said: “The time will come when you are going to tell my stories and sing my sacred songs, to remind us all of the secrets of the earth and of heaven.”

Yes, That little girl was me.

I started to sing in my crib and perform to audiences since I was 9 years old. I absolutely can’t stop writing, composing, singing, creating, painting and dancing.

Self-expression is my lifeline to happiness. I used this my whole life to bring joy to the people in my family, my village and every community I ever Joined.  In my 20’s I built an entertainment business built on those principles.

My first crisis

Then I had a crisis. I fell from grace to the hard floor of reality and bruised my heart and my buttocks.I experienced a deep death/rebirth that started my own journey of discovery. For more than 21 months I closed myself from the world and lived like a hermit.

I truly believed that giving up on life would help me evaporate to another, pain-free world.
I thought that I will never perform again, never produce again, never do anything again.
Instead of death, I found myself exploring the ‘underworld’ and I had encounters with different archetypes and sub-personalities of myself and my tribe.
I entered what Carl Jung calls the collective unconscious.
But I didn’t know that at the time.

I was not thinking, even though I was writing all the time.
I was not analyzing, even though I was processing all the time.
I did not understand the journey, I was feeling it.

I found myself diving deeper into the feminine realm and had a shocking vision.
It took me years to translate this sacred knowledge to practical and earthy tools for upgrading life and living on earth.

That brought me the shadow world and I started investigating: How do we stay happy?

I entered the world of healing, shamanism, Kabbalah, sound healing and other eastern and western methods. I had teachers from all around the world and I started to give women circles, workshops and healing sessions.

My method of working with the voice as the main tool for self-discovery and self-expression grew to be the central philosophy of creating everything.

The seed was planted….and another challenge grew

I went through another crash and I checked out of the rat race. It led me to go deeper into the underworld, on a journey of exploration and discovery. During this time there were a few books that changed the way I looked at life.

“Women who run with the wolves” by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés,
“The Chalice and the Blade” of Riane Eisler.
“The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets” by Barbara G. Walker

Another of those life-changing books was “Red Tent” by Anita Diamant.
In that book, she tells the story of Dinah, the daughter of Jacob, from the bible story.

It was fascinating to see the world she had created from the intimate life of women in that time. Deep inside I knew what she was talking about, I felt it in my bones. I felt the knowledge of those women, my ancestors, and I knew about that ritual.

The traditional women of my tribe practice the celebration of the new moon.
In our calendar, the new moon is called Rosh Chodesh (the head of the month). It’s a day where women gather together, dressed beautifully and celebrate the birth of the moon, a new chapter and a new personal and collective cycle.

A way back to Connection and Happiness

Reflecting on my ancestors, it reminded me of how disconnected I was from nature, living in a city and in a culture that, at the time, still believed that life is random and that we are separate from universal consciousness. These reflections initiated a journey to find my way back to connection and happiness.

In March 2005, I was sitting amongst friends. We gathered to eat and we humbly celebrated the International Women’s Day. At the time in Amsterdam, nothing was happening on that day, so we got together. When the host asked me to use my drum and my voice and to give a ceremony, we naturally created a circle of sisterhood and fun.

a woman wisdom QuoteAnd so it began – sharing and expressing the joy of the divine feminine

Then I started to lead women circles, moon circles, singing circles and workshops in relation to sacred womanhood and voice expression. I was sharing everything that I’ve learned since my burnout about healing, shamanism, sound, and consciousness.
I took part in Red Tents circles of other women, which I still think all women should try.
I was asked to give private circles for rituals of birth, death, marriage and often just great gatherings for girlfriends. All those circles are very powerful, very lovely. I always came out of it with a smiling face.

From being a part of these circles I have learned from the feminine divine about the treasures of my body, the power of my mind, my hearts capabilities and the mysteries of my spirit.   

Living and being in this world we can sometimes forget our female principals of living from the heart but a circle will always welcome you in. A circle will help you to remember, to enjoy, to feel supported, to rejoice, to sing, to connect and be who you are. It is so powerful and simple at the same time. A Circle is the container of life, like the womb, like a woman’s life.

The foundation for Happy Goddessa – The Divine Feminine

All of the knowledge and insights I have gained from these circles, my life and my journey have become the foundation of the “Happy Goddessa Guide”. This guide is about revealing our inner Goddessa by accessing the power of our voice – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

Discovering the missing piece of Happy Goddessa – The Divine Masculine

All women come to this point, I discovered, of needing to honor the inner Queen and let her lead us to a life of peace, manifestation and of feeling whole.
Working intensively with my women’s circle I realized that I was spending too much time in the feminine realm. My Inner Queen was happy and content but my inner King was getting restless and wanted to break away from the soft confinement of the Circle and explore the freedom of the hard Line. My Inner King wanted to EXPRESS himself.
I felt two contrasting forces.
Sometimes my inner King ruled my actions and sometimes my inner Queen was setting the tone.
I was swinging for years between feeling extrovert and introvert, between being commercial and being nonprofit, being too much HER or too much HIM.
I was exploring and going Inside the feminine subconscious abstract world and then running away back to the factual linear rational world.
I was switching constantly between being the in Circle and going outside, in, out, in out, in out.
My inner king and queen could not find a way to lead my life together, they were fighting constantly.
To Live, Lead and Love like a Happy Goddess we need a healthy marriage between our Inner King and Queen.

Know Yourself – Express Yourself

Through the divine feminine, we explore and access our subconsciousness. With creative expression, meditation, music, vibration – we can learn about our core beliefs and connect to our authentic voice.
This is wonderful and freeing. To find an abundant source of happiness and love and connections.
But we cannot stay here. Our journey is not complete.
The divine masculine has a role to play. Through him, we use our strong and empowered voice and express it to others. To family, friends, communities, and society as a whole, bearing witness to the embodiment of connection and contentment inspires change in everyone!

The Nature of Life: New challenges

When I founded the Centre of Fertile Ground Studio in 2009, the Queen and the King had their place, or so I thought. That space was warm and was a real fertile ground for people to grow, to express, to heal and meet other. It was wonderful, and many successful experiments happened there.  But then I lost the balance again and I failed to make the concept sustainable as I was unable to balance it with taking care of my own needs, so I chose to close it.

Trying to find the right balance of the Queen and King, I decided to I to focus all my communication and my creative work through the internet. The freedom, the international connections, the possibilities were all so exciting. And I could spend more time at home with my family making it easier to keep a healthy balance between my mission and my needs.  But something was missing.

Then I had a moment of realization! To have a successful marriage between my Inner Queen and Inner-King, I need again to integrate. I realized that sitting on the laptop is only half the fun and I desperately missed working physically with people.
In short: I need the online events and live events to feel truly whole.

It has all come together for the perfect expression of the Happy Godessa Mission

Opening the channels for the online teachings and events and also the local physical and live events, feels like the right balance of the masculine and feminine for me.

The online aspect is the representation of the energy of the feminine. A platform that unites the colors of the creative industry and the depth of personal growth.

The offline aspect – the live events and workshops, represents the energy of the masculine. The EXPRESSION of my own empowered voice.

All with the purpose of igniting personal and social change and empowerment.